beautymarker | OPEN POST

[Tsukki deals in facts. Things he can see, hear, touch, describe. Suga is, objectively, an incredible person. Hard worker, head cheerleader, the person you would most want on your side. He deserves this.]

Completely hopeless.

Well, at least you've got good taste!

[This time, it's Tsukki ruffling Suga's hair. Long overdue!]

This really does feel nice.

[For a long while, Suga just drinks up the affection in calm, blissful silence. He knows he's fortunate, so incredibly fortunate - the next step, it appears, is to acknowledge what he earns.

After awhile, he finds that the peace of the moment allows him to broach a topic that feels premature in their brand new relationship, but also has to be dealt with before it's right in front of them - his future away from school.]

I've decided I'm only applying to schools in Sendai. There's so much here that I want to keep right within arm's reach, and there are plenty of good education programs locally. I don't need to run off to Tokyo or anything like that.

I see.

[There hasn't been time to process Suga leaving. That he might go to Tokyo, or even overseas. He has the grades. Hearing 'Sendai' sends Tsukki's heart flipping over. Then over again.

He focuses on his hand. The softness of grey hair spilling through fingers.]

If that's what you're choosing - For yourself - Then all right.

It is for myself, yeah. If I change my mind a year, two years down the road, I can always do an exchange program. Right now my heart is still with my family and this team...

[And you. Suga thinks that much can go without saying.]

Going somewhere far away just because I can, or to say that I did, that'd be a choice I made for other people.

[Tsukki appreciates the unsaid. Out loud is too much pressure. Crushing this fragile structure before they get the scaffolding in.]

Good.

I'm glad you're being more selfish.

...Are you going to keep playing? On a club team or something.

[Suga feels the same way. While he's coming to understand that he's liked Tsukishima for a lot longer than he's been aware of the feelings, their relationship is still newborn and can't be treated like it's also had a full school year to develop.]

Y'know, my first reaction is always to say no, but if I'm still nearby and coming out to every Karasuno game I can manage... I know I won't be able to resist. Even if it's just drop-in. I really want to coach a team once I've got my teaching certification so I need to keep my skills up, right?

[Now that he knows Tsukki's alright talking about this, Suga feels like he could go on about it forever. It's been surprisingly hard to find anyone who relates to where he's at, still so tied to his current life but also stepping into one that won't look anything like it in many ways.]

A coach?

I can see that. You have the skills and you pay attention. You could get your ears pierced, too!

[Tsukki grins at the idea of Suga going punk like Coach Ukai.]

Oh no... can you imagine?? I'd be a laughingstock with the kids!

[It's a good look for the right kind of person, but Suga definitely is not that.]

What about you, Tsukki? I know you've got a couple of years to decide, but now that you've had your moment... do you think volleyball will be a lifelong thing for you?

What? You could pull off blond spikes!

[No he couldn't. Tsukki snickers, has to catch his breath. Enough space for the question to break in.]

A lifelong thing...

[His hand slows. Stops.]

I don't know what that would look like.

That's okay. You don't have to know anything to imagine... nobody'll hold you to an idea.

[Suga nudges Tsukki's hand with his head exactly like a needy pet. More, pls.]

Do you ever let yourself blue sky? Pick one little life change you can turn into a potential path and then follow it wherever it goes? As long as you remember that it's not about committing to anything, it can be a nice vacation from all the uncertainties.

Not really.

[There's a few more scratches, but Tsukki's sinking into his own thoughts now. Walls looming.

The problem is none of his life changes have been little.]

[This... doesn't feel like a silence he should let linger. This feels like a misstep on his part.

Suga sits up and gives Tsukki's knee a little shake.]

Hey, Tsukki, get back here. We can stay in the present, I promise.

[It's not Suga's fault. How could he possibly know?]

Right.

Thanks.

[Tsukki breathes in. Winds their hands together. It's so frustrating, sometimes. Thinking he's got everything in order only for memories to jump out at random triggers.]

[Smiling warmly, Suga presses a kiss to the back of Tsukki's hand.]

My head's gonna be everywhere for awhile. You'll probably need to bring me back sometimes, too. I don't want to miss out on any of this.

[He punctuates this with a little squeeze.]

[The noise that Tsukki makes is somewhere between an 'Erk' and a squeak as he gapes at Suga.

Hand-kissing.

What kind of Shoujo nonsense is this.]

What?? [Suga laughs, bright and cheerful, at Tsukki’s flabbergasted expression.] Your hand was within reach, it was the easiest spot to kiss! I’ll stand up to kiss your mouth next time if you really insist.

I'm - I'm not - insisting, I mean -

[Once again - It's authenticity that flusters Tsukishima Kei. The prospect of fully kissing Suga. Under a blue sky, with the sun shining down.]

You are so damn cute...

[There used to be a teasing lilt to Suga's voice when he called Tsukki cute, but now pure warmth suffuses every word and turns the unspoken message from "you silly boy" to "I'm so crazy about you I barely know what to do with myself.]

Do you want me to? If not, I won't. No hard feelings. I know how touch is for you.

I am not.

[He attempts a scowl, which slides into sulk.

Whatever.

There's a much bigger topic on the table. Tsukki doesn't always get a say in major life turns. It's nice having one. Even if he already knows. Figured it out when debating the songs, letting Dessa and From From run through his head for hours and imagining the feeling of - ]

I want you to kiss me.

[With a new softness in his gaze, Suga stands up and turns to face Tsukki. The old desks are so low, and Tsukki's legs are so damn long, that his mouth will actually be easier to reach like this than it would've been with him standing up.

Lord, Suga's heart is racing right now.

Suga rests a hand on Tsukki's shoulder, lifts himself up on the balls of his feet, and takes a moment to enjoy the sweet rush of anticipation before closing his eyes and pressing his lips against Tsukki's in a warm, lingering kiss.]

[Kissing doesn't have a taste.

Or maybe it does, but there's so much else - Smell, touch, the weight of hands on your shoulder. All cranked up to eleven, too much to separate and

Suga is kissing him.]

[Behind his closed eyes, Suga's imagining the shower of sparks that rise from a half-burnt log in a roaring fire when its position takes a sudden shift. Fireworks are his first thought, but while it's warm and bright and celebratory, full of tiny lights winking in and out of his vision, it's not exactly explosive.

It's wonderful. Absolute heaven. Suga could do this all day.

Tsukki, however, seems like he may have frozen again, so Suga doesn't draw out their first kiss any longer. Eyes soft, a dreamy smile on his lips, he gives Tsukki back his personal space - but not before he slides the backs of his fingers down the line of Tsukki's jaw, gentle and adoring.]

[Except Tsukki catches Suga's hand. Pulling him back in range and he's so pretty after kissing and it's like the hug at Nationals.

Easy.

Their mouths match up again. Tsukki's able to pour warmth into this kiss. Confidence growing as sparks flicker. In and out. More fireflies than fire.]

[Oh!

Suga lets out a surprised noise when he's pulled close, and then a lower, contented hum when Tsukki's lips turn soft and pliant under his. This boy's always got to be a mystery, doesn't he?

Now there's music drifting in and out of his consciousness. Melodies and verses from the CD Tsukki made for him, about him, to hold up a mirror that would show Suga how he looks through the eyes of someone who cares about him. He's never been this smitten in his life.

Suga's other hand cups the back of Tsukki's head, keeping him close as he parts his lips just enough to tease Tsukki with a hint of the heat deeper inside his mouth.]

[That's good too.

Tsukki feels some kind of edge rushing up. The potential to fall down and down. Finding other levels, more things to try. There's a quick, clumsy swipe of tongue.

Then he breaks the kiss. Tips his forehead against Suga's, breathing heavly.]

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